Super Two Year Old

Okay, the terrible twos are real. OMG! However, while my daughter is cranky, obstinante and honery, she is very polite about it. Jaida have some carrots. "No, thank you." Time to brush your teeth. "No, thank you, Mommy Kandis." Eat your dinner, Jaida. "No, thank you. I no want dinner."

Now mind you I am not ASKING her IF she by chance would LIKE to brush her teeth, eat dinner, have carrots. I am telling her, and yet instead of just saying 'NO! I don't want to.' She replies with a heart felt and at times teary eyed. 'No, thank you.'

I want to be so kind with God. Here is a dose of learning patience, my child. 'No, thank you.' Kandis, you really need a lesson in faith. 'No, Thank you very much, God.' It's not as if He/She is actually ASKING me if I want a lesson in any given virtue. No it's a dose of carrots I really don't want to eat.

Now I know how God must feel. It's funny and cute, but in the end it really doesn't matter what I want. I am going to get my lesson, eat my carrots of faith and there isn't much that I can do to stop it.

No, thank you.

What I Want My Daughter to Learn

I had an interview yesterday with a woman who is studying 'a group other than her group' meaning she's Mormon and I'm a lesbian. Not that any of this matters, but during the interview she asked me a question that I has been on my mind ever since. That question is, "What do you want your daughter to learn?" At the moment my answer was quite the norm I suppose. I want her to learn to be kind and love others. I want her to know God and that God loves her even more than I do. Nice sweet answers. But I want her to learn so much more.

I want my daughter to learn:

That there is no one in the world more wonderful than she is.
That she is no more wonderful than anyone else.
We are all amazing and wonderful in our own ways.
That animals are fantastic creations that can teach us a great deal about love.
That it is good to ask why.
The reason the sky is blue.
The reason we adopted her.
The three "Rs"
How to cook.
Everything she needs to know to get ahead.
To share.
That the meaning of life is living.
Table manners.
The magic of 'Please and Thank You'.
That sometimes Mom is wrong.
That most of the time Mom is right.
How to apologize when she does something that causes another person pain.
To say please and thank you.
To be strong in the face of defeat.
To be gracious in victory.
To have compassion for others.
To defend those who cannot defend themselves.
To stand up to bullies.
To use her words first.
Tae Kwon Do
How to eat well.
To love exercise and how good it can make you feel.
To fit in and yet still be her own person.
To be proud of who she is and what she believes.
To be respectful of those who believe differently than she does.
That debate is one thing and that arguing is another.
To behave the same when someone is watching as when no one is.
To approach life with an open mind.
To think before she speaks.
To speak the truth in love.
To always have a vivid imagination.
To know that I have never in my life loved anyone or anything, except the Lord above, more than I love her.
To never give or loan anything to anyone that she can't live without.
To be generous with her time and talents as well as her money.
To be wise with her time, talents and money.
To dream big dreams.
To never be afraid of accomplishing big things.
That time is a precious commodity.
To tell the truth all the time.
Be honest with herself as well as others.
That spelling words correctly is very important.
That using good grammar is as important as spelling.
Getting a college degree is by far one of the most important things you need in life!
These are from Grammy:

That Jesus loves you

That Grammy and Grampy adore and love you

That your mommas are very smart and love you unconditionally

That this life is the time to prepare to meet God

That baby kitties smell so sweet

That puppies will bite - but it is all in love.

That turning the cheek isn't easy but worth it most of the time.

That life is short, so we have to try to be good every day.

That hard work is good for the soul.

That where much is given, much is expected.

To be continued.....

I'll have a cup of God, Please

They were talking yesterday on the radio about "Soul Issues". I'm not sure exactly what that means, but the response from the young man about or to whom they were speaking was, "But I go to church every week." Think about that. "I go to church every week." Are we so incredibly blinded by 'religion' that we think 'going to church' is the answer to our soul issues? Before we begin this, let me state emphatically that I think going to church is a good thing and I am in no way opposed to it, BUT going to church isn't ever going to deal with any issues of the soul. The only way to deal with issues of the soul is to discover your conduit to touching the Face of God. I believe that we as humans are created with a certain need, desire, longing to connect with something that is much bigger than we could ever imagine. To capture Joy in a bottle if you don't want to call it God. Having given this some thought I began to realize the obvious. We are so busy filling our lives with junk food time wasters that we don't have time to see that we have forgotten our quest. We play the Wii, we watch "The Girls Next Door", we cruise the internet, we drink, we do drugs, we find anything we can do to avoid being alone with our own thoughts. We seek so desperately to fill that 'soul emptiness', which craves fullness, with anything that comes along. Some people will eat themselves to death to be filled. We all do something. Going to Church is only another thing we do that we think will make us feel full, but for some it only lasts as long as we are sitting in the pew. When we walk out the door it now becomes our responsibility to find that conduit. I know people who don't go to church who will tell you that they know God intimately through skiing. Of course. How awesome to look down on the perfect run on a crisp winter day in the midst of a glorious creation. Imagine taking that deep breath before you push off. How AMAZING! My personal conduit is music. I feel the presence of the holy, the Joy, the Creator, or whatever you wish, when I listen to, sing or write music. It often brings such joy to me that I can't control my emotions and I know that there is something bigger than I am flowing through that sound. Some people write while others paint. My mother rides her horse. Tibetan monks meditate and find that connection in silence. There is something in all of this that is common. There is nothing false or contrived about any of these things. They are creative, introspective or touching nature in some fashion. It is time for us to take a break. Stop right now and take a deep breath. Find your Soul Healing in that conduit. Find your path. Your soul will be satisfied.

Is this Success?

For the second day in a row the Dom and Jane raido show gave me something to think about. Here is my letter to them:

I never have time to call when you guys have the BEST subjects, but it gives me time to think and absorb the gravity of certain things.
While I was contemplating the definition of success I came to a startling conclusion that actually brought a tear to my eye. Let me tell you a true story.
My brother’s girlfriend, whom he loved deeply, contracted ovarian cancer. By the time it was discovered it was much too late to treat. For 6 long and agonizing months she suffered while this nasty disease ravaged her body. In the waning moments of her life the last word she spoke was “Finally.”
Her success was in leaving this life. She was finally released from pain and suffering. She was living for that one moment when she could let go. I came to realize in an epiphany moment that sometimes 'success' is death.
I realized that in our society we mostly think on success as the material. I have nothing against success and money. GOD no! I love money! But my success comes from other things. Watching my baby smile as I come in the door, taking the perfect picture, learning a new skill. My success is the living of life. To others it’s the attaining of the goal. To some it’s leaving this life and moving on to another.
But no matter how we define it success can be life or death and it’s just that simple.

Too depressing? Call me Captain Bring Down.